TTC week 2.

Just want to share some updates! Well, I bring some not-so-good news, but I am just so blessed to have a very optimistic husband. On our way after my check up, I asked him, "Bi, pano kung hindi ibigay ni Lord, pupunta ka ba sa Cebu at maghahanap ng babaeng pwede mong anakan?" (Since we've seen the replay of Ang Dalawang Mrs. Real last Sunday) He said "ang aga aga pa ano ka ba! Kumain ka ng saging para mabuntis ka!" (because I don't eat healthy foods) I am happy that I have a very supportive husband. I know it's too early to lose hope, but I have this low EQ thing that I get happy, sad or depressed easily.

Here's the result of my 4th ultrasound this cycle.

According to my OB, the follicle did not increase in size as we are all expecting. I had discharge, so I was expecting that I am already ovulating. But the ultrasound broke my heart. However, I now have three dominant follicles. (before I only have one) so that's still good news right? My body is reacting to meds! So now I just have to wait for my AF and take Fertyl this time. She's increasing my dosage next cycle to increase the chances of winning! mehehe. She said we just have to try and try. I'm still young and there's still hope. We're not giving up. :)

much love,

Niki xx

Crushing over Dandan! :)

Happy Monday everyone! I know Monday is toxic for almost everyone, so I am sharing some positive vibes today. Just squeezing a dose of inspiration on my busy Monday at work. So I've never been a huge fan of Daniel. I've known him since he is my former girl crush Heart. They're a gorgeous couple before, right? Daniel is soooo inlove with Heart back then. Been stalking them in instagram and I really want them to end up together. But they broke up and it broke my heart too! Anyway, enough about her, let's just move on.... :P

So Daniel joined PBB. And I was watching that show ever since. I honestly think that he is the ONLY housemate who is deserving to get the title. And believe me, this is the first time that I've sent messages to save a housemate! He's my uber duper crush!! He's more than just the hunk that everyone talks about! I even used our office phone to send BBS DANIEL!:P (since it's one vote per sim only) And when I heard the announcement that he is the big winner, I hugged John and cried hard! (while he's laughing.) grrr. Haha. I just admired him for being so nice to everyone (apart from his six-pack pandesal mehehe). Now I told my husband that I will name our future child Daniel Kenji. He told me we're not Japanese but I said I want him to be like Daniel Matsunaga. hahaha.

Sharing some photos of the Matsunagas from Daniel's facebook fan page. :P

Happy Monday! :)


much love,

Niki xx

First week of hope.

Hello everyone! I just want to share my TTC journey updates after taking Provera and Ova-mit after my AF. Last Tuesday, I am so nervous (and excited) to know if my body responded to the meds that my OB prescribed. I had been checking this forum everyday lately to understand a lot about my condition. (Aside from my OB's advice of course.) So my follicle should react and be bigger than usual.

And I am just so hopeful that there is a dominant follicle in my right ovary!:) However, my OB told me that it is smaller than usual so I need to go back to her after three days for another ultrasound to check if my follicle will increase in size. I still hold on to the "at least one reacted" side than the "it's smaller than usual."

Then I went back to Dra. Clutario yesterday to check.

And according to her, my follicle did not increase in size as expected. :( I am frustrated hearing that, but then it's too early to feel bad. It might be that my ovulation is delayed because of my condition. But it's okay, we had an assignment to BD. I told my husband regarding this and he said that I shouldn't feel bad. In fact, the original plan is to have a baby after a year, and we're still four months ahead of schedule. I just don't like the idea of hearing not-so-good news. Anyway, bright side is, I have my very supportive husband to accompany me every check up. :) I am not losing my hope on this. :) no stress and positive vibes! (Plus I'm on my 2nd week of novena today so I have everything with me.)

much loveeee,

Niki :)

My TTC journey.

I have been looking for people who can understand my hopes (and some frustrations) on our journey to have our little bundle of joy. Most of my friends are already moms and single ladies with steady boyfriends. So that leaves me with no one who can relate. And I suddenly remembered... Girltalk helped me to plan my wedding! Now I searched for the right forum to share this bittersweet experience... and I found a lot of threads!

It is just fun to broaden my vocabulary, that I am now aware of "ttc", "af" and other online codes that I should be aware of when reading forum messages. Anyway, I just feel good that a lot couples can relate with the situation that I am in right now. I have also seen successful girl talkers who are already moms! And that gives me hope. :) My closest friends are also supportive in this journey that I am in, only that I chose to share my condition to my closest friends. My bestfriend (who has the same condition as mine) said she will include me in my prayers and true enough, prayer is the most powerful thing that we all can do! Another friend sent me this little image of a lactating Mama Mary. He said this is why his sister got preggers! There's nothing wrong having faith, right? So I always keep this in my bag. :)

So that's it for now, I am in my second day of Clomid today. With a lot of prayers and the help of science, hopefully I'll have our little bundle of joy soon. :)

Much love, 

Niki xx

Sweet Pea Online

Hello sisses! :) I'm back from my roller-coaster ride of emotions. =P now that I am feeling better, I want to share some good news. :)

I have been an online seller since Multiply days. I remember when I started, I only have 300 pesos as my capital, and then I bought some accessories and tried to post it in my site. Thank God for multiply, I was able to reach girls from Luzon to Mindanao! I was able to raise 1,000 from the 300 pesos!:) I stopped when multiply closed. And felt bad that I can no longer have this little "sideline". I am an online shopper myself, so I know the feels when you buy online. Ergo, I think, I can sell too! :) Then instagram happened. I decided to sell online via this app, this time, I sell phone cases and accessories! And fortunately, a lot of online people patronized my shop. It used to be @kismetfabfinds but now I am relaunching my little baby! :)

Here's the good news! :) When my bestfriend Ghia and I talked about it, we thought that it's a good plan to start selling authentic imported items (since she can hand pick US items) and sell it here! Plus I can buy affordable kikay stuff here and re-sell! Nice tandem! :) Now I made a facebook page, renamed my old instagram account and I am starting to post items there. Let me share a little review of one of our first items.

Bath and Body Works Ice cream scent with Sweet Pea

Honestly, I do not have any plans to sell this. But there's a little story why I decided to.
One of my closest friends had this as her car freshener. And when I ride her car, I always tell her "Chot ang bango talaga ng koche mo!" Thoughtful as she is, she surprised me by giving me this!

My own sweet pea cupcake scent! :) My car smells like heaven now! :) And then she told me where she bought them, and I got curious. It is a bit pricey, and then I asked my bestfriend if she can find something like that and I can help her to sell them here. And now I am so happy that we are selling them like hotcakes! They're too cute to ignore! So now do yourself a favor get your very own cute and super bango clip scent!:) I assure you, it will be so hard for you to find it online! :)

You can see more of our designs and other cute stuff here:

Facebook page: https://www.facebook.com/SweetPeaShopOnline
Instagram:@sweetpea_online
Email address: sweetpeaonlineshop@gmail.com :)


I'd love to hear from you girls soon!:)

much love,

Niki xx

Playing Favorites.

As much as I want to share positive thoughts today, I cannot. Allow me to share something not so pleasing about myself today, that I have been containing since I was young. Please take into consideration that I have unbalanced hormones today, which might result to a more emotional entry.

Since I was young, I am a certified lola's girl. My inang took care of me since my parents have to work hard for us. As the eldest, I was able to experience the life of not having your toys, because your parents do not have money to buy you everything. My parents are disciplinarian. That might be the reason why I grew closer to my inang than to them.

Also, I grew up to be the least favorite of my parents. And I have accepted that. Or so I thought. Growing up, it is so hard to be compared to the most favorite. It is hard to be establishing your own standards and not meeting them, because your parents' standards are waaay to high. There are some circumstances that you really can't avoid. Like hating yourself because you can never please your parents. because you're different. and you did not grew the way they want you to.

Life is unfair, but I know I am still blessed that I woke up this morning and it's our weekly payroll and I will get my salary today.

bye.


PS. I know I didn't make any sense. Pardon.

High hopes. :)

Hola! I know this is something worth sharing, just because, I shared something about John and I having our plans to have our little bundle of joy soon.

So after some struggle, I finally decided to ask for my OB's help regarding my reproductive system. I finally had the guts have myself checked, since it's been three long months. Yes. And I'm not preggers. That is something to be scared about, right? :( And so last week, we went to Cardinal Santos for my much awaited check up. After two years, I was reunited with my dearest OB Gyne. I had my papsmear test, ultrasound and I it seems like I received an unexpected slash expected news. I'm not pregnant, and I still have PCO.

YEs, I've been diagnosed with PCO since I can't remember when. For a not-so-medical person like me, hearing about follicles and chuva chenes makes me sick. Fortunately, my husband is there to support me, so he's the one who is listening to my doctor while I'm thinking about a lot of things that will affect our future and our family. God knows how much we love kids. Since I was ten, I can remember playing with my baby dolls and imagining how it feels like to be a mother. And now that I think it's about time, I am struggling to have my own little angel.

But the story does not end there. I am in my twenties and my doctor said it's too early to panic. Thank God for angels like Dra. Lali, she's having her hopes high. Now I am undergoing some medications to correct my hormones and help me to conceive.

Please help me pray to have someone like this uber cute little girl. :)

PS. I'm not giving up. :)

Much love,

Niki xx