Four months.

Exactly today marks our four month countdown before our big day. Wait lang naman, parang di parin ako makapaniwala. Parang kelan lang iiyak iyak pa ako sa shower with dausdos sa dingding, tapos ngayon, four months nalang and I'll be Misis Catalan na???? Di nga?? I checked my calendar, September 4. It gives me this awkward, nervous yet wonderful feeling that I'll be marrying soon!! (less the expenses of course!:P)


Seriously, I think I am having cold feet this early. I have this big question of: Am I ready? ay big pala wait lang AM I READY? I've been seeing weddings and little babies in my facebook timeline lately and I just can wait to have my own. But of course, our plan is to enjoy married life for a year. I have this hormonal imbalance thing and I am really praying that God will give us a child in His time. Anyway, looking backward, (backward talaga?) feeling ko di pa ko ready. Not that I still want to do a lot of things before settling down (because I have enjoyed my singlehood! yezur!), but because I do not know if I am mature enough to say goodbye to being Ms. Mendoza. It is indeed a big responsibility to be a wife. I must admit, doing chores is not my cup of tea. I am more of a work than stay at home person. And when I get married, I should be the best wife, and by that, I should know how to serve my husband. I know how to cook, and I love cooking, but I dislike cleaning the sink after I washed the dishes. My mother taught me how to do my laundry, iron my clothes, make my bed, for she told me, time will come that I will be doing this for my own family. Ngayong countdown na, parang, pwede rewind??

oh diba, parang minion lang ako sa sobrang panic. Plus, di pa complete yung list of suppliers namin. Ano ba yun?? But I learned how to manage that wedding stress now. Syempre, kung yung nanay ko ang nanay mo, lahat ng klase ng wedding prep stress! (You know, the typical mother of the bride chronicles.)

So looking forward naman tayo, I know I will never be ready to be a wife and a mother. But I also know that I have such an amazing husband to be who will support me even if I watch TV all the time during my spare hours. John has been very supportive to me ever since. He only has one expectation and that is "mahalin mo lang ako ng lubusan." asus! keso! ahaha. Kidding aside, God gave him to me because he is the best person for me.

Till my next wedding echos!!:)